December 2011
3 posts
the single life. a lethal mixture of loneliness and horniess
i want a fuck to make me emptier
i want to cry whenever theres a moan
i want you to leave before i wake
but dont leave without a kiss on my forehead
my only solution is to masturbate in hopes that this will all go away
all i really want is to be wanted
kh-risma:
nothing can sober me up
November 2011
5 posts
Deux Flames
its the fear of not only the warmth my touch gives off but of how it feels scorched
its never the same
its the fear of not only that everything feels in place but of how you wont allow yourself to feel anything
its the all the same
its the fear of not only the cycle of self denial and trials of losing yourself but of how it’ll combust a fire so strong it can’t be put out
i’m the same.
He bathes in only crystal clear water, it doesn’t reflect nor hide what’s beneath. He shivers as the warmness gathers around his body, he was never use to the warmth. He lived on coldhearted, snorted only to himself and created a mind full of fantasies, escapes and graves. He felt uncomfortable in this heat. The blazing fiery gold of ones speech and entirety. He shone above all and maybe it...
∞
I guess I like to think of forever because it soothes the thought of now, this instant. The reality of everything that pushes me every second is smothered by the word forever. It’s motionless.
I feel attractive.
October 2011
2 posts
it sucks to know that ill never be over him. theres still that curiousity and hunger to find out what he’s up to.
i’m not fit to be in a relationship nor am i stable.
idk. i hate myself
6 tags
its complete fuckery. this is the straw that broke the camels back. lesson learned.
—
its a week into my month of sobriety until my birthday. so far, it fucking sucks. it made me realize how my communication skills are so askrewed from drinking. the one thing i hate is finding something to occupy yourself with. at this moment, starbucks has yet to officially hire me so im stuck on my...
September 2011
4 posts
3 tags
dealing drugs with the devil
I couldn’t take the look on your face.
Theres a snowy image that grinds through my guilt. The look of when we first met. Your smile simply innocent and your voice a tone too low. When we compared hand sizes, our intentions clear but we were too afraid to show them.
But most of all, your eyes.
You killed me with your eyes.
How they never kept a straight gaze but wandering to places...
3 tags
moving along now
i’m bitter.
i havent had the chance to express my thoughts.
although i miss him, its as though he completely forgot about me. i’m forgettable. yeah, i brought you to a concert.
i’m upset that we don’t have conversations. all it comes down to is how we’re doing and hi. hi. hi.
you continue to make me incredibly frustrated. ahhhhh. i dont even KNOW you. i’m...
2 tags
october 23rd
positive: loyal, responsible, travel, communicative, intuitive, fame, creative, versatile, trustworthy
negative: selfish, insecure, stubborn, fault-finding, dull, withdrawn, prejudiced
soul mates: jan 4, 31, feb 2, 29, mar 27, apr 25, may 23, june 21, july 19, aug 17, sept 15, oct 13, nov 11, dec 9
August 2011
12 posts
2 tags
15
in past eight months, i’ve lost fifteen pounds. from january to the last time i checked the scale two months ago, i lost ten and today when i stepped onto it, yet another five. 15 pounds. i have always been at a constant weight for the past 4 years and i’ve dramatically dropped weight ever since i moved out. it’s all the m and skipped meals, not to mention how hard i dance when...
2 tags
envy
i have this undying love for jealously. i’ll take a look at all the gay cliques that have formed over what? fuck buddies and backstabbing bitches? yet there’s a force within that still says fuck you and your friends. fuck you for being so fit and being a fabulous bitch that you are. yeah, it makes me laugh but really, fuck you.
2 tags
there she goes
i dont want to try anymore. its dispersed into nothing. nothing at all. i didnt know how to feel but its been a nice ride. i could care less. goodbye was easy. i can only thank you for that. i miss my beau. my beau my beau my beau. asjsjosicujekwoos
3 tags
pretentiousfckz:
You acting like it’s somebody...
1 tag
people are bland but i have no substance
1 tag
ii ye
and after this, there will be no more. i’m fucking sick. brb k_ll_ng m_s_lf
2 tags
but i dont blame them
i dont care about myself. i’m too busy thinking of what other people think of me, if i have their approval or if theyre in love with me as much as i am with them. i should be selfish, narcissistic and not give a fuck. i’m scared of what will happen next. i won’t find anyone who’ll cherish and love me as much as i love them. somehow the levels of my affection surpasses...
1 tag
step one
i cant bring myself to terms that this is part reality and part imagination. its all in my head, isnt it? from the way you felt to the way i’m feeling. this is all in my head. but…where were we again?…
1 tag
so what are we going to have, dessert or disaster?
i don’t want to lose myself within you.
2 tags
all i want is one last night together
we’d do all the things we use to do to each other in bed and i’d wake up in your hair. morning kisses to say goodbye and hello to leaving a piece of me behind. tell you how sorry i am and that i’ll always think about you.
3 tags
what comes after this?
the tribulations, the feelings, the hurt, the revival, the self-awareness, the guard, the awkwardness, the effect, the judgment, the grace, the support, the beginning, the distance, the love
postyou